EI: Awareness and Focus
“The band’s hand-painted banner contained two skulls with bony fingers, presenting a tattoo-like scroll that said the band name; one skull smiling, one grimacing. The image wasn’t original, in fact it was an age-old symbol used in theatre. The Greek Muses of Tragedy and Comedy.” ~ from my book Ace Egos
The Rockstar of the Ego
Our emotions feel like they have automatic tendencies. These tendencies help us create responses to life – as life happens. Our identity can be really invested into a certain tendency – and it distracts us from seeing where and how we might focus our energy. To bring about greater harmony within the ego – all the masks, the selves, the skulls that we are. Sometimes we simply want to burst out of who we are, and shake the layers of our ego. Like a rock star exploding on stage.
In this week’s Beyond Emotional Intelligence topic, we learned about ‘Awareness and Focus.’ We know that Awareness means many things, but nonetheless, it is something we can make use of. To help our thinking. Focus is a form of Awareness. Like lightning, which might be the catalyst for an explosion. Of greater awareness. With focus, we bring our attention, or shine the light on, a specific area. This idea of ‘Focus’ AND ‘Awareness’ make a powerful combination. I like to think of ‘Focus’ being a concentrated energy. This can be integrated back into our identity, to further enrich our connection with ourselves.
Sometimes we find a situation to be challenging. It can feel overwhelming. Simply put – we don’t know where to start with this situation. Sure, we might be aware of it. We may even be able to focus on a solution. But the effort in ‘focusing’ can be a de-motivator. Or the ‘routine’ of the solution reduces its effectiveness. Or, the skill of being able ‘to focus’ is something we still need to develop further. What if ‘Focus’ could be an easier choice for us? To achieve what we want? To become, or ‘unbecome,’ who we want?
Ascending to Greater Heights
How can we be more ‘in harmony with the ego?’ I have developed a simple activity – called ‘Ascension’ – that has four parts, which work together to increase the positive impact of ego in our lives. I’ve worked this activity into a card deck that I am using to help people develop their Emotional Intelligence. In this post we look a little more into the first of these four parts of the activity: Input.
Input is about exploring. If we want to initiate a change in our lives, we need to know where to go. What feels like a good place to start? That’s all we need. To go on the journey and reveal the learning. There are three types of ‘Input’ to guide us to ‘where to begin.’ These types are:
- Explore avenues of activity.
- Explore avenues of intelligence.
- Explore avenues of rest.
Depending on which of these we choose, it sets up our possibility for change. We now have a direction. Shall we engage in activity? Or, engage in exercising intelligence? Or, give ourselves the opportunity for rest? Following through with these choices will generate us the information we need to then work with the three other parts of ‘Ascension.’ These other three are:
- Audience – the who of this change – ‘who’ you relate to.
- Scale – the how of this change.
- Output – what will manifest from this change?
- Remembering that you start with Input, which is about inviting change into your life. With this invitation comes the initial question: ‘Where will I look to cultivate this change?’
Having an ‘Input’ now allows us to focus our awareness on something specific. In this, our brain will be working on itself. We will further investigate how this workout develops in future posts. There, we will discuss Audience, Scale, and Output more in detail.
The Night Sky
There is no limit to choice. Where we place our mind in a given moment ties that experience into the infinite threads of existence. No one way is going to be right or wrong. Effective Emotional Intelligence provides us with room for pause, allowing options to arise, choosing, and reflecting. The adaptive quality of Awareness enables us to shift perspective, so we may select ways to arrange (or rearrange) our story. Amidst all the unnecessary and unhelpful plethora of thoughts that swamp us.
Our greatest resource – Awareness – acts like the stars, the moon, and the sun – all in one. The sun is about the brilliance that Awareness brings to our lives. The moon is the reflective quality of Awareness. And the stars are what we focus on. Concentrated specks of light. Concentrated energy. Focus, is ultimately, an act of self care. It means we are tidying up our lives, making our purpose feel powerful, and infusing our day-to-day lives with glimmers of positive radiance. This inspires others, and literally makes all of us in the world feel better.
Our efforts for personal development are a night sky. If we look up at the stars, we see that they are not in some sort of obvious uniformity. Not any recognisable pattern. This is how we are when it comes to how and where we place our focus. Stars in a cluster, some distant, some stronger. We can connect them; and trace images, or form stories. With increased skill in Emotional Intelligence, we can arrange the stars before they’ve even been created, before we’ve even written them into a story. Here, we make, and even transcend, ourselves. Following a simple wisdom: that there is always the possibility for change. And in that, we can feel free.
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