EI: Nature of Success
Building, Not Working
Being successful at anything comes through perseverance and preservation. ‘Real success’ – the sort that we feel in our heart and soul – external measures of success cannot fulfill. This heart-centered success never needs to be blasted in our faces. It is sensed by others. In our quiet confidence. A way we do things, that nourishes us, making every day a cherishable adventure. It is in the ‘how’ we live our lives. The ‘how’ – in the work that we do.
In Beyond Emotional Intelligence, we practice ‘Seeing the best in self and others.’ The inspiration this approach provides is invaluable. Impacting the capacity and willingness to understand and improve who we are. Transforming even the most challenging parts of ourselves. Considering our work occupies a large part of our identity, it would be helpful to also be ‘Seeing the best in our work.’ Translating ‘Seeing the best in self and others’ to how we see ourselves in relation to what we do. Developing a supportive outlook affords us a springboard, so we are living a quality life, all of the time. Not just after we stop working.
When I catch myself enjoying the work I do, I am not working. I am building. This simple use of terminology shifts my relationship to my job. When I notice myself not enjoying the work, I am ‘not building.’ I am doing a disservice to the thing being built. Reducing my openness to explore. Which limits me discovering the best and most meaningful way to be building. In all cases, if I chase the joy of finishing what I am building, I never arrive to ‘the joy’ I am chasing. So, chasing that joy is pointless. When the building becomes the joy, the work energises me, rather than exhausts me. And it becomes fun to get work done.
Tasks Are Friends
In ‘Seeing the best in self and others’ we are bringing our best energy to our community. New friends are made; and with current friends bonds are strengthened. This comes through how: we choose to see our relationships; the positive energy it generates in us; and welcoming everything and everyone into our circle. With these efforts, we build a realm of support. And we experience a range of emotions that reinforce our efforts – trust, love, happiness, lightness, humour, depth.
If the experience of our work was a community, tasks would be the characters in that community. Tasks are sometimes new and unfamiliar, or familiar and easy to get along with. They give us experience. They help us refine processing. The results go back into our pool of resources and resourcefulness. This contributes to making our larger goals more effortless. With tasks being our friends, we welcome them into our circle, and if need be, release them with unconditional friendliness. If we have friendly relationships with our tasks, our work is a valuable entity that we invest our identity into.
I have noticed that if I set myself a few small tasks, complete them, and genuinely say ‘good job’ and feel warmth, I am willing to do more small tasks. And on and on. Piece by piece, the bigger tasks are eventually done. A whole day of incredible progress. But only because I got interested and embraced making friends with each task, as they were set in front of me. Receiving them with curiosity and enthusiasm. My identity as ‘task-doer’ wants to make my identity as ‘task manager’ happy. And vice-versa. A mutual respect and sense of duty. Depending on each other for the feeling of fulfillment that comes from success. And in that, the feeling of fulfillment is the success.
Posture Is Purpose
When it comes to setting the tone for work, posture is key. This is not necessarily sitting up perfectly straight, agonisingly holding the same rigid position. But, more about ‘strategic’ and ‘energetic’ posture. This helps remind ourselves about the reason why we do our work. It helps us meet our projects with an authoritative position, so our work must take us seriously. Then, when we get into it – physically and emotionally, we can be relaxed. We can let the work dictate to us what needs to be done. To be in the flow with the process. But we can’t relax and let go into it without showing up with a strong frame, first.
This is what we learn in the realms of sport, artistic disciplines, or even social interactivity. Having posture gives off an impression. And it helps us establish our purpose, a purpose that we connect with in ourselves. In sport, the purpose might be to compete. Dancing, to enact a story, and facilitate dance partners through that story. In social settings, to captivate others, to listen, or simply make someone’s day better.
Most importantly, posture communicates to yourself that ‘I am here, I am present, I am ready.’ The ultimate purpose is to be in collaboration with the Universe. Through creativity, connection, and communication. Whatever work we are doing, we are either directly or indirectly making this collaboration with the Universe possible. Our posture opens us to the Universe, where endless possibilities are available. More layers of meaning in ourselves, and deeper relationship to the world. Greater understanding of what you are doing, and why you are doing it.
Next time you enter the world of work, resonate with what you have done to get there, and what gains this current work will offer you. And appreciate the tiny details. What we take for granted is how we are building, and what we are building upon, every moment. This is where our work is a glowing representation of Life – overflowing with miraculous gifts.
This post is free to listen and read for a short time. To access all posts at any time, please consider a paid subscription. Click here for more
Header Image: Ibrahim Kusuma. Visit their profile on Unsplash 👉 click here
Comments ()